so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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