All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
