Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
What did we do last night that was yellow?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize