We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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