No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
