"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
