Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
