the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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