You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
