Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
