why didn't you poke me back
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Just cropdusted the office
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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