Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
