I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize