I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
