he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
