i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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