i was born a porn star she said
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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