i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
His hands were made for my vagina.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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