our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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