I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
