Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
