is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Randomize
