If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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