I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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