walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
