i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize
