I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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