Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Randomize
