This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Farmville is her only friend.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
