That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
