Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
