i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I am available for nakedness
how does that bad decision feel?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
