he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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