I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
