I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
