Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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