i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
