so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
