in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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