Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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