I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
