xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
