I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
