I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
