Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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