Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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