this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize