My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I have already put on my inside pants.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
