I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
