Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
