she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
